April 12, 2017

 So last night I ended up watching the last two episodes, and the half hour special, of 13 Reasons Why. I was up until 2:45AM and didn't get to sleep for awhile after that because it took some time to turn my mind off. The show was so good but also incredibly heavy. I liked that they didn't shy away from the rape scene and that they showed the suicide. It confronted both head-on, showing how terrible and haunting both are. It was disturbing, unsettling, tragic, and all the other words you can think of to describe things that are just awful. I cried more than once throughout the last two episodes and the only reason it didn't happen more was because I was putting up a valiant effort to fight it.

I also really liked that they made the companion episode talking about the show and the real-life aspects of the show. I really think the show as a whole is a good opportunity to educate people about the consequences of their actions, no matter how trivial they perceive them to be. And that everyone is a complex human being, just trying to figure life out, and that they deserve love and respect. To paraphrase the show a bit, everyone has their own truth, how they perceive the world around them and the people they interact with. Sometimes it is hard to put yourself in someone else's shoes and see their truth because it's so different than your own, but that doesn't make it any less valid. We're all worthwhile in our own way, and some people need a little more help accepting their own worth.

Due to my late night, I was yawning throughout the day. It was worth it but I did occasionally zone out and get lost in thought about the show.

I didn't take notes about my day so I'll probably forget things but it was pretty uneventful. I agreed to talk about verbal abuse and profanity at the next all-staff meeting. I started talking to my boss and another librarian about it and it looks like now I'm also going to try and include hate speech, which I'm supposed to write up something for so it can maybe be added to our policies. A lot of my free time for the rest of the day was spent learning more about hate speech.

I read articles online and pulled a few books we have on. It is interesting, and way more complex than I thought it would be. A lot of things are covered by free speech but I think there are nine things that aren't. It seems like as long as you can frame the speech within the context of those things, then people can get in trouble for it. But if you frame it incorrectly, people can get away with being a horrible person. I also learned that because our laws are based on the Constitution and all these legal precedents, it is much harder for people to get in trouble for being assholes online. Other countries have very specific laws against hate speech, but we're still trying to figure out how to align it with our past laws. Very tricky stuff.

I volunteered to take over the summer reading program with the librarian who is currently doing it for our department leaves next month. I'm hoping it is not too involved because she's already done the hard work, but we'll see. I have to learn the new software we are using for it this year, which shouldn't be too bad. I helped out a little bit today trying to come up with prize ideas. The site the librarian was looking at was pretty “expensive”, relative to our budget at least. I suggested the Oriental Trading Company and getting someone a little more fun because adults like fun things, too. You don't need to be a kid. We found foam fingers, like the big ones they have a sporting events, but they are tiny. Instead of putting your hand in it, you just put your finger in it. I think it's pretty great and I would definitely because encouraged to participate so I could get one.

It kind of feels like that is all I did today. I was on desk for awhile, helped patrons, talked about the two different blueprint ideas for remodeling the library with my coworkers, did walkthroughs, pulled DVDs for my display, and restocked tax stuff. All the daily stuff was still present. This afternoon we had our department meeting and that went well. Same old stuff really.

Eventually the workday was over and I went to pick up Chipotle. I circled around the block twice and then took a much longer loop to kill some time before I was able to find a spot. And then I stood in line for a long time so I could get my underwhelming food and head to my Mom's house. I only had a couple videos to show but my Mom had one to throw in the mix, so it wasn't a total loss.

After dinner we sat around and talked until around nine o'clock when I called it a night so I could run to Target to get a few things. And then I came home.

In the middle of the night last night my computer updated itself. This morning I had a window for EaseUS Todo Backup on my screen. My mouse felt like it was moving through molasses, which didn't really matter because none of the buttons I clicked on actually worked. I tried restarting the computer but that didn't work either. Tonight I tried booting in Safe Mode but that also didn't work. I ended up emailing their Support so hopefully they get back to me soon. The most annoying thing is I don't think I've ever even heard of EaseUS Todo Backup and now it is locking me out of my computer. Thankfully I have my laptop but this is still really frustrating. And I'm not sure how my audio journal is going to work out. Or at least the video portion of it. We'll see.

I'm going to try messing with my audio journal now and then go to bed because I'm freaking tired.